08 January 2013

Magpie Tales 150: Townhouse

image by Daniel Murtagh, via Magpie Tales

"Colleen, I...I...when can I...?"
Question unanswered, she shuts the door,
While he clutches his Donegal tweed
hair beaded with misty rain,
Going cold there on the doorstep
hands losing sense-memory of her,
Door latches, a metal snick
cutting the strings of his heart

22 comments:

  1. Sad...love "hands losing sense-memory of her" Nice work!

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    1. "Sense memory" is one of my favorite phrases. Thank you!

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  2. "cutting the strings of his heart"...

    I really liked your take on this week's prompt, Irish

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  3. losing sense memory of her. yea...thats good

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    1. I find that to be the best way to describe that feeling of losing love...

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  4. Excellent take - sad when the strings of our heart are severed...

    Anna :o]

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  5. It's not good to cut the strings to a man's heart! Great piece!

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    1. Not good, indeed. Something I have too much experience with, I think :) Thank you!

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  6. In very few words you told a story of immense proportion!!!

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  7. Lovely and atmospheric, Irish...

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  8. The Wife and I have been watching a lot of British period shows on Netflix. This reminded me of a scene that might fit in with that. Good stuff.

    Jason
    The Cheeky Daddy

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    1. Now, if only I could get in with the writers of Downton Abbey...:)

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  9. Replies
    1. He knows what he lost, that is certain.

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  10. Replies
    1. Yep, right to the heart. Thank you for stopping by!

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  11. Sad! He might as well give up on her.

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    1. He might...but I don't think he wants to :)

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  12. Such a lovely sad poem. I can picture his look and feel his disappointment. Ah, lovesick lads.
    The photograph is wondrous!

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"Let your laws come undone
Don't suffer your crimes
Let the love in your heart take control..."


-'The Hair Song', by Black Mountain

Tell me what is in your heart...